Sometime last night Julia began her first period. This morning there was blood in her panties which she discovered in the bathroom. We have been talking about menstruation and maturing since last spring on and off. We have two body books and last spring her science teacher taught a human body chapter. Julia has listened. She was not scared, just a bit surprised. She took it mostly in stride as I explained using pads -- the reality, not just in theory. She was not crazy about bleeding all day, and she complained some about it but only at home to me and to one of her therapists who was as even and unfazed about it all as I am. Julia told me tonight that she wanted it to be over which actually is pretty age appropriate.
She seems to understand what she has been told but there is so much of her that is so much younger than a 12 year old with her first period. Some of the juxtaposition makes my head spin. I know that this too, Julia’s emerging womanhood, will fold into her/our lives, but once again the terrain is not familiar. Julia took a bath tonight. She is almost able to take care of her newly cut hair herself, and as usual she asked to play with her bath toys. Then she got out of the tub and I supervised her putting on of a clean pad.
Had this not happened today, my lead story would have been that Julia had a play date today -- her first in years. She has gone to friends’ houses when I have gone and played, and this was also a friend of mine with a daughter in Julia’s class. But this was a specific invitation for Julia. I wanted her to do it so much that I canceled a therapy session -- I can’t imagine doing that for most kids, but it was as important as the session.
Playing Julia has her flaws -- she is slightly better at conversation and friendship than she was last year, but she is usually more interested in the task or the game or the activity than the person. It was ok today, and I hope that this child will want to come to our house.
And ya’ know, I seem to grow only more and more protective of her. I understand the impulse but at times, I need to let go a bit and let her be herself.
Tomorrow, Chicago and T-rex Sue.
Awe, Julia is growing into a woman. A friend's daughter is sometimes challenged to handle her budding womanhood (due to some delays/past hurts) and her mother and I have talked about it extensively. I imagine that you are giving Julia exactly what she needs and that soon this will become what it is for all of us... Although what that is I'm not quite sure. All of the words that I have are negative and yet that's not my heart and so I don't want to put that down. Is it; routine, normal, a must.....I don't know.
ReplyDeleteIt's truly hard for me to grasp that Julia is old enough and yet I know that she is. My own oldest girl only started a year ago.
Bless you friend. I've missed reading you - sorry to be so busy with the kiddos. I don't do near the reading or writing that I once did. I miss it but am loving homeschooling.
Love you!!
Traci