There is change.  For both of us.

When Julia does some bad behavior -- mostly these days not listening in a timely fashion -- I immediately give her consequences -- like, in the car going to therapy this morning, she was supposed to eat breakfast.  Instead, she played with her iPad and when we got to IDS clinic, she had not touched her strawberries.  And so, no iPad for the rest of the day.  She is angry but contains herself.  She apologizes and tells me she will try again next time.  When she gets out of the car, she wants to hug me.  We had two instances of consequences this morning before we got to clinic but no angry words. I know she is getting angry because she almost immediately forgets why there were consequences.  Her concentration is completely on her loss.  I ask her what happened (lost the iPad for the day) and why (did not eat before playing).  I still need to connect the consequences with the reason for them.  She will learn eventually, hopefully before she is 35.  

I am at a meditation retreat today -- the day-long retreat that is part of the MBSR course.  There will be three or four classes here today and the room is lined with chairs.  I feel a bit tentative but more sure of myself than usual -- I feel like I am part of this world although I would be hard pressed to define what I really mean by “this world.”  I have the sense of belonging.