I love this time if for nothing else but not having to wake up early 5 mornings a week.  I am so much better at 7:30 or 8 or even 9 than I am at 5:45.  Julia is no different.  Once again, it is hard to fathom that there is a time during the year when we cannot go outside barefoot and in sleeveless shirts, when preparing for the day means sun screen and bug repellant, when the sun is up long before we are out of bed.  It is this time of year when it is possible to find my own rhythm and for Julia and I to figure out how to spend our days.

We spent most of today at the Madison art fair.  Just walking and looking.  It was hot and we had lunch inside with air conditioning but there was at times a small breeze walking around.  Julia enjoyed looking.  She asks questions about paintings, she told one artist that his dragons were too fat and short, she wanted to buy big sculptures.  Would that I could fill our house with more original art.  She pointed out some very interesting work.  I bought more bowls at the high school student ceramic sale and Julia asked to buy her own vase.  She now wants to find fake flowers to put in it -- we’ve seen wooden daisies and paper mums.  We didn’t see any today.  It will be another project to find some.  Possibly make some?

We’ve seen the physical therapist twice in the last 6 weeks or so.  Julia has one thigh bone that is twisted so that her one foot twists in.  As she has grown over this past year, her gait has become just a bit off.  There is no fix for this aside from surgery and no need for surgery unless the leg hurts.  We can, however, strengthen the muscles and work on her balance.  So, the PT has assigned physical exercises which in themselves are pretty boring.  I found a “chore chart” app for her iPad and she is collecting check marks -- one for each exercise she does -- and a reward at 40 checks.  This carrot at the end of the process has worked before and I’ve left the reward pretty open ended.  She has her eye on a plastic dragon from “How to Train your Dragon.”  If she does the work, I am happy to buy her the toy.  We may have a bit of an influx of dragons in the next few months.  And even though I have not set up any academic work for Julia to do this summer, and have been so very intentional about this, physical work feels so different that I don’t mind it at all.  Neither does she.  

Interestingly, Julia is still reading, doing her reflex math computer games and occasionally picks up math workbooks.  I don’t discourage any of it and when I am making supper, I will ask her if she wants to do her reflex, but none of it is scheduled into our days.  This is still hard for me but I am learning to let go of my idea of progress just a bit.

Ok, now for a bit of a vent.  When we are at the pool during the week, I can take the water aerobics class at noon a few days a week.  Julia sits on a lounge chair and reads or draws.  I am not sure which of us is happier with the arrangement.  Anyway, she was on the chair and I was ready to get in the water the other day, when Julia asked two girls sitting a chair away if she could play with them.  They were close to her age and 12 year olds do not ask to play.  I know that.  But.  The girls looked up at her, glanced at each other and put their heads down and began talking to each other.  Julia, ever persistent, asked again.  Politely.  Again, she was ignored.  I bent down to Julia and said, “Maybe those girls don’t want to play.”  And I was going to let them off the hook completely, but then I realized how hard Julia and I and all her teachers and therapists have been working on social skills.  Here were two neuro-typical kids whose behavior was exactly what we have all be trying to discourage in Julia!  So, I took two steps towards the girls and in a very friendly way said, “Hi.  I take it that you probably don’t want to play with Julia?”  They looked up, embarrassed, apologetic and aware of their behavior.  They began apologizing but I stopped them and with a smile on my face, told them that when they should respond to the question.  They didn’t have to play or talk but they should answer the question.  I turned back to Julia and she had been watching and listening which I hoped for but did not expect.  She said, “They didn’t have good behavior?”  “Nope,” I said, “and I expect you to do better.”

It pissed me off greatly to see Julia ignored.  It happens relatively often outside of school and church.  I usually try to ignore it and move Julia along, but I am going to stop protecting NTs who don’t know how to talk to Julia.  Instead, I am going to ask those strangers who stare or snicker or ignore to be as polite as I expect Julia to be.  

Perhaps I will change the world.