Third Anniversary

Julia is just waking up, Mary called a few minutes ago.  I've been up for awhile, answering texts and emails and checking face book.  What I wrote yesterday, it true for today.  I am in a new place, the intense grief of the last few years is not present.  At least not now.   I now know that difference between grief and sadness.  And I have plans for the day.

I am fully enjoying the new found energy to engage in my world, my life and Julia's life.  I am very grateful for the healing power of good friends, quiet counsel and time.  I read what I wrote of this day last year and the year before.  And the day before this day -- last year and the year before.

And I also wrote and posted this:

A day to abide with what comes, to be gentle with ourselves, and to remember that great loss can only happen when there was once great joy.

I wonder how long I will be making posts like this on July 4 and 5th.  It will be as long as I need to do it.  The lilies that I called David's lilies have not bloomed yet, possibly in another 3 days.  When I got my new credit card in the mail two weeks ago, I remember thinking when I signed up for that card that when it expired, David would be dead 3 years.  I could not imagine that time and now it is here.  What ways to mark such a time -- lilies and a credit card.

Possibly more later.